July 28, 2011

The Art Of Compassionate Compromising

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If Congress doesn't learn how to make comprismise, we'll likely pay the price. 

There are good compromises (for the greater good) and there are bad compromises (giving in to get along).  In this case, I'll dwell on the art of compromising, when compromising is the order of the day. Take the current budget/debt talk in Congress: They are politicized, personalized and short sided. If the NFL can cut a deal, why can't they?

One answer is simple: Ego.  No one wants to be on the losing team.  No one wants to think they've been bested by someone else.  Later, if our bull headedness leads to a disaster, we can blame the other side, claiming they wouldn't budget (meaning, they wouldn't do it our way).  In your life, you'll face situations when compromising is the only way to get it right.  Here are a few rules of the road: 

1 - Remove yourself from the picture.  De-personalize the negotiations, letting all counter arguments be about the thing (the deal) and not the author (you).  Just because someone has a different POV doesn't mean there's anything wrong with yours.  

2 - Focus on the impact of the decision, and the parties that will be helped/hurt.  Put this issue at the center of all discussions, like a good hospital admin does with a patient.  When negotiations are getting in the weeds (read, partisan/selfish), bring it back to the impact with a story about a specific individual who's livelihood depends on a deal being cut. 

3 - Reach out for opinions.  Go beyond your inner circle, and use your Social Tools to get a bigger POV about the issue.  The more you invest in expanding your information flow, the more you can think bigger in a situation. 

4 - Ask yourself, "If I make this compromise, what's the worst that can happen?" This will liberate you,as you'll quickly realize that life will go on - likely much better because of your Abundance Mentality.  Too often, we never consider this, and the vagueness of the defeat conjurs up images of your dashed reputation and utter lack of self-respect.  

Please share this with your Congress person, he/she needs some help here.  

 

Posted at 8:46 AM in Business Effectiveness  |  Permalink  |  Comments (0)  |  TrackBack (0)

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